


Where did I end up?

by That_1_Name



Category: The Pacific (TV)
Genre: Angst, Gen, POV Second Person, Reflective narration
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-05
Updated: 2019-08-05
Packaged: 2020-07-31 16:14:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 446
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20117914
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/That_1_Name/pseuds/That_1_Name
Summary: It should’ve been easy.  Once he gets back home, life would just go back to normal, days would fall back into place, yet the shaking won’t stop.





	Where did I end up?

What was shaking? Your teeth are rattling in your own skull too loudly to really focus on the spinning, distorted world. All that you can hear are the explosions of voices marching in your ears. Something is shaking, but you’re not sure what it is. The shaking hasn’t stopped once since you got back, and you can’t seem to find what is causing it despite how it’s making you spill your drink. 

Then again you’ve been too preoccupied wondering if you got off at the right stop. “Home” is no longer where you left it; your “family” never used to look at you with those eyes that are full of that bullshit pity given out on Sundays; even your favorite bar feels off. Everything is not where you left it, and it scares you to think that you might have lost your way home a long time ago. 

The dreams come surfacing from the bottom of a pint, surging up and out onto the dirt that’s not quite as tough or coarse as sand or coral. At least though it’s not shaking, the tremors visible just on the edge of your perception. You wonder if this is what it felt like to go Asiatic, or if you’ve finally gone mad after the third month back in a place that sold you a promise it couldn’t keep.

Time to pay up at the end of the day, the tab ain’t free but it did come at a fair cost. Cost you half your soul buried six feet deep in a foxhole thousands of miles away; cost you what shred of humanity you have left in that place where your heart used to reside before you left it behind; cost you a ticket to paradise and a seat at the last supper. Here’s your change: a home that doesn’t know this stranger that has stolen your face, a scenery that has gone blurry with each drink, and a sun that hides the moment you wake up.

After smashing the bottle against a nearby wall, the blood flowing like the sea down your palm, do you then realize what is shaking. It’s you that’s shaking because the bill was too high and demanded too much of you, and it was not fucking fair that no one told you just how much you would lose. As you punch the wall, the red waves splashing against the solid rock, while the rain comes falling down from your withered soul, that’s when you finally accept how fucked up you are now, and how the world kept going as if everything was normal.

**S**_ituation _**N**_ormal; _**A**_ll _**F**_ucked _**U**_p._

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: This fic is based off of fictional portrayals of historical figures; no ill will is meant or intended.
> 
> Here's a short little thing I had sitting in my folder. Might write a companion to it. For now, hope you enjoyed it and have a lovely day.


End file.
